Lyrics -- Tell Thing about english songs lyrics

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"The Thanksgiving Song"

"They wanna hear the thanksgiving song! All right.."
"This is uhh, This is the Thanksgiving Song"
"I hope you enjoy it."

[Starts playing]
Love to eat turkey
Love to eat turkey

[Shout from Crowd:] "I love you Adam!"
[Adam Sandler:] "Ohhh, I love you!"
Love to eat turkey
'Cause it's good
...

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"Toll Booth Willie"

[Car approaches]
[Toll Booth Willie:] "Welcome to Worchester. Dollar twenty-five please."
[M1:] "Hey, how ya doin' Toll Booth Willie?"
[Toll Booth Willie:] "Good! Thanks fer askin, pop!"
[M1:] "Aww, that's great, you know, considering yer a f**kin' idiot!"
[Pays toll and drives off]
[Toll Booth Willie:]...

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"The Respect Chant"

Respect
Respect
You gotta show the f**king respect

[Repeat Over And Over]

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"The Longest Pee"

[Line of people talking]
"Hey man, let me in there first"
-"Go ahead man, take it easy"
"Thanks, I really gotta pee"

[Open door, close door]
[Unzip pants]
[Start pissin..........groaning....]
"Oh man"
[.....]
"Ohhh yeah"
[.....]
"Ahhhh"
[......Stop Briefly]...

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"The Lonesome Kicker"

Me, I'm the Lonesome Kicker
Extra points, field goals at your service
One might think it comes with glory
You might think different after you listen to my story

My helmet is equipped with a tiny face mask
What it possibly could protect, I do not know
The other guys on the team
Like to make fun of my little shoulder pads
And also like to hide the special shoe
I need to kick in the snow
...

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"The Hypnotist"

[typing sounds]
[Dr. Stewart:] Hi, [I'm] Dr. Stewart.
[Gary Phelps:] Hi, Dr. Stewart. Nice to meet you -- I'm Gary Phelps.
[Dr. Stewart:] My pleasure. Gary, have you ever been hypnotized before?
[Gary Phelps:] No, I haven't. I'm actually quite nervous, but I just, uh, I --
[Dr. Stewart:] All right, and you were referred to me by anyone...?
[Gary Phelps:]...

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"The Goat Song"

I am a simple goat
I live on the back of a pick-up truck
The Old Man tied me here with a 3-foot rope
Am I happy he don't give a f**k
Hey goat, I'm gonna beat your head in with a hickory stick
Sometimes he uses his fists
He's filled with anger, and filled with rage

And tells me I smell like piss
His drink, Jimmy Bean
His chaser, a bear
After that, various alcohols
That's when the beatings get so severe
...

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"The Excited Southerner Orders A Meal"

[Adam:] And the now the excited southerner orders a meal at his favorite
diner.

[Waiter:] Hi, what can I get you today?

[Excited Southerner:] Hi, how are you...I was...if you could, tell me, if you...eh,
the chef salad, if it, does it come, if you come... a la carte, if you see the...I
saw the breakfast menu and the, and they got the, and the different entrees
...

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"The Cheerleader"

[Sound of pom-poms]
[Cheerleader: With annoying feminine voice]
"Ok you guys, let's hear some spirit!"
[Performing cheer]
[Cheerleader:] "United, we are united.. We'll be 'cause we're the
Tigers, we're out for vic-tor-y - Yeah!"
[No response]
[Cheerleader:] "Come on you guys! I wanna hear you!"
[Still no response]...

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"The Chanukah Song (II)"

Put on your yarmulke
Its time for Chanukah
So much funnaka
To celebrate Chanukah

Chanukah is the festival of lights
Instead of one day of presents
We get eight crazy nights

When you feel like the only kid in town
Without a Christmas tree
Here's a new list of people who are Jewish
Just like you and me

Winona Ryder,
Drinks Manischewitz wine
...

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"The Chanuka Song"

"Okay...
This is a song that uhh..
There's a lot of Christmas songs out there and uhh..
not too many Chanukah songs.
So uhh..
I wrote a song for all those nice little Jewish kids who don't get to hear
any Chanukah songs.
Here we go..."

Put on your yarmulke
Here comes Chanukah
So much funukah
To celebrate Chanukah
Chanukah is the festival of lights
...

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"Voodoo"

Hey there Mr. Leaf Blower Man
Keep it down for goodness sake
It's way too early in the morning
Can't you please use your wooden rake?
You choose to ignore I
Even though me hungover
That's not being nice
So tonight, your head will be covered in lice

Voodoo spell on you
Voodoo Voodoo
You shouldn't have given that dirty stare
Voodoo Voodoo
Too late for sorry, go cut off your hair
...

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"What The Hell Happened To Me?"

Hey you guys, I just wanted to thank you for listening to the record
and I hope you had as much fun as I did and here's one last little diddy just for you.

I used to ride my big wheel, and sell lemonade,
Eat popcorn with grandpa while we watched the parade
But now I'm only happy when I'm drinking J.D.
What the hell happened to me?

I used to have fun throwing snowballs with my best friend Billy
...

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"The Adventures Of The Cow"

"And now a cow at bat in the bottom of the 6th inning
of a little league game getting hit by a pitch"

[Baseball sounds and cow bell ringing,ball is hit and hits cow]
[Cow:] Moo

"And now a cow who goes skydiving for the very first time,
and thinks his parachute isn't gonna open when it finnally does 40 feet from the ground"

[Plane sounds]...

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"The Beating Of A High School Bus Driver"

"And now, the sever beating of a high school bus driver."

[Kids getting on the bus]
"How are ya, Bryan?"
"Good morning, Lisa."
"Good to see ya, Tommy!"
"Hey, good morning, Cyle! Nice new backpack!"
"Watch your step now, Joseph."

"Uhh, young man. Can I help you? Can I see your bus pass, please?"
...

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"The Beating Of A High School Janitor"

"And now, the sever beating of a high school janitor."

[Mopping sounds]
Mop, mop, mop
All day long
Mop, mop, mop
While I sing this song

[Sound of someone walking towards him]
Gonna wax the floor
Gonna make it shine
Gonna take of the spray paint
With turpentine

"Hey! Don't walk there! I just mopped!"
...

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"The Beating Of A High School Science Teacher"

"And now the severe beating of a high school science teacher."

[Lecturing]
"Zinc is by far the best element."
"I also like plutonium."
"It's just fun to say."
"Plutonium."
[Sound of someonee walking towards him]
"How's your plutonium?"
"Good, thank you."

"Excuse me!"
...

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"The Beating Of A High School Spanish Teacher"

"And now the severe beating of a high school spanish teacher."

[Lecturing]
[Writing on chalk board]
"Juan es muy guapo."
[Door opens, walking towards her]

"Hola."
"Senor?"
"Hay problema?"
"Mi casa es su casa."
[Scream]
[Beating sounds]...

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"The Buffoon And The Dean Of Admissions"

"And now a buffoon's meeting with the dean of admissions at a prestigious college."

[Dean:] "Well Michael, I would like to extend my warmest congradulations
on your upcoming graduation and I understand
you are interested in matriculating here in the fall."

[Buffoon:] "I got a snake, man!"

[Dean:] "Yes, pets are welcome here on campus.
...

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"Teenage Love On The Phone"

[Richie:] "So ya doin' good?"
[Samantha:] "Ya, I'm fine, how 'bout you?"
[Richie:] "How good could I be? I haven't seen you in three hours."
[Samantha:] "Ohhh, Richie. Hey Richie, my dad's down the hall,
and he doesn't want me on the phone.
So if I hang up on you, it's just because he's coming."
[Richie:]...

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